BILLY MAYS HERE

Tired of hearing about how to order things in just three easy payments? Order this with only three easy payments.

Funny or Die Presents the literal music video for Beck’s “Loser”

Alan, Alan, Alan, Alan!

Pikachu Van, courtesy of Flickr

In soviet russia, vodka shoots you!

This is the PEN Story in stop motion. They shot 60.000 pictures, developed 9.600 prints and shot over 1.800 pictures again.

If you put some toilet paper inside an airplane toilet and then roll the rest of the roll out down the aisle the toilet will consume all of the paper.

This trick really sucks.

Amazing, the best thing I’ve seen today.

Lyrics:
Chorus:
Oh, no! Here we go, with the flow (here we go).
Chasin’ gold ’cause that’s the goal, or so we’ve been told (with the flow).
I think we’ve all played that role, so I don’t care what you say (chasing gold).
‘Cause everyday we role play. Everyday we role play (ooohhhwowowohh).

Verse:
I’m not a 9 to 5′er, a daily grinder.
I smack a wench in the mouth, just to remind her (smack her in the mouth).
I’m not a stranger to danger. I, myself, am a Ranger.
I got a Dark Elf and a Wizard in my crew. So, don’t think we’re afraid of you.

I’m a Dark Elf, I’m my bad ass self (that ass is so bad).
Slitting throats, killing folks, trying to be myself.
I’m like, “Don’t be mad because I’m bad.” You know,
I was born that way. It’s like being gay (Uncle Larry!).

Chorus

Verse:
Rule # 1: No hitting in the face.
Rule # 2: If you get hit in the leg, drop to your knees and let out a shout. If you get hit again, then you’re out.
Rule # 3: Memorize these…(Follow these rules)

Look at their face, see their fear.
A puff of smoke and the wizard appears (wizard appears).
I don’t care if you stare at my wicked warez,
my Wiccan flair, my white flowing wizard hair.

Chorus

Verse:
Wait, is this like playing WOW?

No, Ogre licker. I’m a real wizard kicker. If you snicker, it will trigger my sword to grow bigger.
To all you WOW kids: you know what joblessness is, or who’s job it is to gargle goblin jizz (gargle goblin jizz)?
And it’s not PC in this PVE to diss another brothers MMORPG.
But it aint PVP, this is you versus me, and I make all my weapons out of PVC.

I’m true to this game. I got a unicorn tattoo.
So, all you role playa haters. Is this real enough for you?
I’m a wizard. I’m an elf. I like sparring. By yourself.
You both suck. Rangers rule. I challenge you to a duel.

(We’re jousting on Sprees)

Watch me hack. Watch me slash. Watch me steady, spend that cash.
Maidens sing their siren song. Let me see that iron thong.
Chastity belts really turn me on. Wizard staff grows hard and long.
L to the A to the R to the P-ing. Hand to the hilt, grab the sword and swing.

Chorus

Ratatat tat, how about that.

Be careful when you fall asleep at the hands of a toothpaste artist.